I remember seeing my anaesthesiologist standing over me telling me it was all over. I don’t know if I dreamt that because she told me it would happen, or if it really did happen – but the next thing I really remember was being in the recovery room.
My nurse Debbie and my anaesthesiologist were looking after me. I was in a lot of pain when I woke up and was really uncomfortable. In pre-surgery, they tell you of the “pain scale” and that the nurses will ask you what your pain is like from 0-10, with 0 being no pain and 10 being the worst pain you’ve ever felt. Debbie asked me what my pain was and I said 8.
Why 8? I have no idea. It was definitely painful and I was really uncomfortable, but maybe I was thinking I had been in worse pain before? I have no idea when that time would have been. Maybe I was just trying to be a bit tough – 8 sounds not as bad as 10? I have no idea, but they gave me some morphine to help and started to get me ready to head up to the ward.
I was assigned to a semi-private room and hooked up to a machine that would allow me to administer my own morphine on a timed basis. Every 6 minutes I could give myself another shot if I needed it. I was still in a lot of pain when I got up to the ward, so I hit the button a few times in a row – it just beeped at me signalling me “too early!” The nurse who set up the machine told me it was timed so I wouldn’t become a drug addict. Okay, I guess I can handle a bit of pain for a few more minutes.
Cayley and my Dad came in right away to see me. It felt like forever since I had seen them, but really, it was only 4 hours.
My nurse was named Florence and she was from Nigeria. I couldn’t help but think of Florence Nightingale, so I knew I was in good hands.
My drain was pinned to my gown so I could see what I would have to deal with when I got home. Florence and the team of nurses emptied it for me while I was in the hospital, but I was on my own once I got home.
I also had these things wrapped around my lower legs that squeezed different air patterns through them at different intervals. This was to keep the blood circulating in my lower legs and prevent any complications.
I was given a few exercises to do to move my legs and help expand my chest. There was a big bandage around my chest so it felt really tight. Also I was told from the anesthesia and other drugs that I would need to take deep breaths to stretch out my chest.
My stay in the hospital was pretty routine. I had lots of people come visit me on Tuesday night. I slept on and off throughout the night. (it is hard to stay asleep when you need to take meds or get checked on every few hours – plus every time the pain medication wears off you wake up).
Wednesday morning came around and Cayley was there at 7am to make sure he didn’t miss seeing the surgeons check on me. Both surgeons said everything went smoothly and that we would see what things looked like when the bandages came off.
A physiotherapist and someone from Community Nursing came in to see me as well. I dozed on and off throughout the day. Honestly, I felt like I could have stayed another night and just slept – but then I’d look over at my Dad and Cayley and knew that if I didn’t get out of there, the two of them would likely keel over from boredom. They had read all the magazines, talked about every piece of equipment in my room, every bit of flooring or paint was discussed, and then they just sat there watching me. At least at home they could maybe find something else to do! Haha
I was discharged Wednesday afternoon and headed back to my Uncle’s place to start my recovery.
Thursday, 1 December 2011
Surgery (2 of 4)
After arriving at the check-in counter for surgery, we took a quick walk around the block. This helped get my body moving and staved off the hunger pains I was starting to have. No eating or drinking for 11ish hours makes Aidan a wee bit angry at times…my friend down in SF coined the term “HAngry” and that is me in a nutshell some days!
My brother called before my surgery and I chatted with him for a bit – we joked around a bit, chatted and bit, then he wished me luck. (As a side-note, my Uncle, the doc, said as we left his house that morning “I’m not going to wish you luck – there is no luck involved, it’s all skill and you have a greatly skilled team of people taking care of you. See you soon.”) We didn’t have anything left to say in that phone call, but I really didn’t want to hang up. Hanging up meant I had nothing left to do but surgery and I wasn’t sure I was ready yet.
But as has happened for most of this year, my choices were limited, so I hung up the phone and went back to wait in the lobby.
My Surgeon called me first to talk to me. Up until that point, I felt like I was handling things fairly well. Sure, I was tired and a bit hungry, but I hadn’t cried or yelled or done anything really out of the ordinary. I felt pretty calm and that I was being patient while waiting. I went into the little room to chat with her. She had her scrubs on and her cap and asked me how I was doing. I said okay. She asked “Are you ready for this?” I sorta shrugged and she said “well as much as anyone can be ready I suppose.” I half smiled and then tears welled-up in my eyes – dammit, I didn’t want to cry!
She asked me which breast was being operated on, as I had to tell her for safety reasons (please don’t take the wrong one!!!), and then she wrote on my chest and told me she’d see me later.
I had to put on a hospital gown and these long green socks. Apparently they are compression socks to help avoid getting blood clots in my legs during surgery. They are also ugly as you can get – but I guess that means no one will steal them! Ha ha
My PSurg came in next to draw some more lines on me to help guide her and the Surgeon for what they needed to do. She told me that when this was all done, I’d have nice perky boobs – but it’s just a really hard way to get them. I laughed, and cried a bit, and then waited for the next person to come chat with me.
I was tearing up more than I would have liked. When I first got diagnosed, I read of a girl I had gone to high school with who was a bit older than me, but had gone through the same thing. I read her blog and on the day of her surgery her husband wrote the entry to update her family/friends. He said she was doing well before her surgery, smiling and laughing and making jokes with all the staff, and then he posted a photo of her in her hospital gown and funny cap you have to wear – she had a big smile on her face. When I read that I thought to myself, I want to be like her – brave and laughing enough that it makes it seem like not that big of a deal.
Well, I was nothing like her. I felt like I was okay, but then a nurse or doc would ask me something and I would start tearing up again. In fact, I’m tearing up right now writing this. I tried my hardest but I just couldn’t be as brave as I had hoped.
At least I didn’t freak out and try to run away! Or yell or scream. I just sat and waited and tried to make sure all my last-minute questions were answered and that I remembered my birthdate for the millionth time.
My anaesthesiologist was the next to see me. My Uncle specifically asked this woman to do my surgery and she agreed. She was really nice, attentive, young (mid-30s I’d guess) and my Uncle said she’s awesome at what she does. She certainly made me feel at ease and outlined each of the steps that would happen next. She told me that she’d help me go to sleep, then the next thing I would know she’d be waking me up, telling me it’s all over.
Ricky the nurse came in next all asked me a few more questions. He asked me what operation was being performed today, and of course, I start crying. I think he felt really bad and he told me he was sorry but I had to tell him, again for safety reasons. I managed to get it all out and he squeezed my hand and told me everything was going to go really well.
So I got onto the bed to get ready to be wheeled into the OR. I said goodbye to my Dad and Cayley and then the attendant wheeled me in. She smiled at me but all I could think about was her longish, white moustache…seriously! Maybe she was growing it for Mo’vember.
Ricky the nurse met us at the doors and guided my bed next to the OR table. I got onto the table and then he started to attach monitors to me. I kept staring at his Oakley eyeglasses and thinking that they were pretty stylish. Anything to keep my mind away from what was about to happen.
I had to be strapped to the table so I wouldn’t fall off. Then my anaesthesiologist gave me my IV, some oxygen, and then told me to think of nice thoughts. And then I was asleep.
My brother called before my surgery and I chatted with him for a bit – we joked around a bit, chatted and bit, then he wished me luck. (As a side-note, my Uncle, the doc, said as we left his house that morning “I’m not going to wish you luck – there is no luck involved, it’s all skill and you have a greatly skilled team of people taking care of you. See you soon.”) We didn’t have anything left to say in that phone call, but I really didn’t want to hang up. Hanging up meant I had nothing left to do but surgery and I wasn’t sure I was ready yet.
But as has happened for most of this year, my choices were limited, so I hung up the phone and went back to wait in the lobby.
My Surgeon called me first to talk to me. Up until that point, I felt like I was handling things fairly well. Sure, I was tired and a bit hungry, but I hadn’t cried or yelled or done anything really out of the ordinary. I felt pretty calm and that I was being patient while waiting. I went into the little room to chat with her. She had her scrubs on and her cap and asked me how I was doing. I said okay. She asked “Are you ready for this?” I sorta shrugged and she said “well as much as anyone can be ready I suppose.” I half smiled and then tears welled-up in my eyes – dammit, I didn’t want to cry!
She asked me which breast was being operated on, as I had to tell her for safety reasons (please don’t take the wrong one!!!), and then she wrote on my chest and told me she’d see me later.
I had to put on a hospital gown and these long green socks. Apparently they are compression socks to help avoid getting blood clots in my legs during surgery. They are also ugly as you can get – but I guess that means no one will steal them! Ha ha
My PSurg came in next to draw some more lines on me to help guide her and the Surgeon for what they needed to do. She told me that when this was all done, I’d have nice perky boobs – but it’s just a really hard way to get them. I laughed, and cried a bit, and then waited for the next person to come chat with me.
I was tearing up more than I would have liked. When I first got diagnosed, I read of a girl I had gone to high school with who was a bit older than me, but had gone through the same thing. I read her blog and on the day of her surgery her husband wrote the entry to update her family/friends. He said she was doing well before her surgery, smiling and laughing and making jokes with all the staff, and then he posted a photo of her in her hospital gown and funny cap you have to wear – she had a big smile on her face. When I read that I thought to myself, I want to be like her – brave and laughing enough that it makes it seem like not that big of a deal.
Well, I was nothing like her. I felt like I was okay, but then a nurse or doc would ask me something and I would start tearing up again. In fact, I’m tearing up right now writing this. I tried my hardest but I just couldn’t be as brave as I had hoped.
At least I didn’t freak out and try to run away! Or yell or scream. I just sat and waited and tried to make sure all my last-minute questions were answered and that I remembered my birthdate for the millionth time.
My anaesthesiologist was the next to see me. My Uncle specifically asked this woman to do my surgery and she agreed. She was really nice, attentive, young (mid-30s I’d guess) and my Uncle said she’s awesome at what she does. She certainly made me feel at ease and outlined each of the steps that would happen next. She told me that she’d help me go to sleep, then the next thing I would know she’d be waking me up, telling me it’s all over.
Ricky the nurse came in next all asked me a few more questions. He asked me what operation was being performed today, and of course, I start crying. I think he felt really bad and he told me he was sorry but I had to tell him, again for safety reasons. I managed to get it all out and he squeezed my hand and told me everything was going to go really well.
So I got onto the bed to get ready to be wheeled into the OR. I said goodbye to my Dad and Cayley and then the attendant wheeled me in. She smiled at me but all I could think about was her longish, white moustache…seriously! Maybe she was growing it for Mo’vember.
Ricky the nurse met us at the doors and guided my bed next to the OR table. I got onto the table and then he started to attach monitors to me. I kept staring at his Oakley eyeglasses and thinking that they were pretty stylish. Anything to keep my mind away from what was about to happen.
I had to be strapped to the table so I wouldn’t fall off. Then my anaesthesiologist gave me my IV, some oxygen, and then told me to think of nice thoughts. And then I was asleep.
Pre-Surgery (1 of 4)
Well I am home now, but haven’t had the energy to sit a computer long enough to type out my updates – so you will get a few in one shot.
We headed to Vancouver for my surgery. The only plans I had while there were to attend my pre-admissions appointment on Monday, surgery on Tuesday, and follow-up appointment the next Monday.
I will admit, having an Uncle who is a well-respected doctor at the hospital group you are going to really makes things a breeze. Pre-admissions started out with me checking in and watching a video about what surgery was like, the recovery room, and the ward. I was lucky enough that one of my most amazing friends specialized in recovery room nursing and was able to give me the low-down before I left – it was SO helpful to know ahead of time what to expect.
I had to give a few more blood samples to a nurse who checked my name, birthdate and id number about 14 times – good to know she’s thorough and has the right patient! It’s funny though – you think that you’d sound like a recording after repeating things so much…but they switch it up all the time! Keeps you on your toes to make sure you are really the person going in for surgery. Although, if you weren’t me, would you really want to do this willingly???
Then I met with a nurse and then an anaesthesiologist to answer a few more questions. They both work with my Uncle and were really nice and reassuring. They spent as much time as I wanted with them, yet were still efficient enough that we were done before the parking meter expired!
The rest of Monday was spent visiting my Grandma and shopping with one of my best friends. Seemed like a pretty normal day – except I was shopping for unscented lotions and shirts I could put on easily after surgery, not fun clothes or other fun things! (okay I’ll admit, we ducked into a few stores to look at clothes and boots ;) )
Tuesday rolled around and we were up early to head to the Nuclear Medicine department at the hospital. Because my MRI showed ‘no indication’ of tumours in the lymph nodes, the surgeon was only going to remove a sentinel node during my surgery. The sentinel node is the one that fluids first drain to in any specific area of the body, then it disperses the fluid to the other lymph nodes in the area to help flush out any waste or excess fluids. If the sentinel node is removed and examined and shows no sign of cancer, then my cancer will not have spread and we are all happy campers.
To find this sentinel node, I was given an injection of radioactive material into my breast near the nipple. During surgery, the surgeon would take an instrument and wave it over my chest – the loudest beep is where the radioactive material first went to drain and we have found the sentinel node! I’m imagining it was like a Geiger-Counter from Science 9 – but I was going to be asleep so I really don’t know.
After that I was ready for surgery so we headed over to the check-in area to wait until it was my turn.
We headed to Vancouver for my surgery. The only plans I had while there were to attend my pre-admissions appointment on Monday, surgery on Tuesday, and follow-up appointment the next Monday.
I will admit, having an Uncle who is a well-respected doctor at the hospital group you are going to really makes things a breeze. Pre-admissions started out with me checking in and watching a video about what surgery was like, the recovery room, and the ward. I was lucky enough that one of my most amazing friends specialized in recovery room nursing and was able to give me the low-down before I left – it was SO helpful to know ahead of time what to expect.
I had to give a few more blood samples to a nurse who checked my name, birthdate and id number about 14 times – good to know she’s thorough and has the right patient! It’s funny though – you think that you’d sound like a recording after repeating things so much…but they switch it up all the time! Keeps you on your toes to make sure you are really the person going in for surgery. Although, if you weren’t me, would you really want to do this willingly???
Then I met with a nurse and then an anaesthesiologist to answer a few more questions. They both work with my Uncle and were really nice and reassuring. They spent as much time as I wanted with them, yet were still efficient enough that we were done before the parking meter expired!
The rest of Monday was spent visiting my Grandma and shopping with one of my best friends. Seemed like a pretty normal day – except I was shopping for unscented lotions and shirts I could put on easily after surgery, not fun clothes or other fun things! (okay I’ll admit, we ducked into a few stores to look at clothes and boots ;) )
Tuesday rolled around and we were up early to head to the Nuclear Medicine department at the hospital. Because my MRI showed ‘no indication’ of tumours in the lymph nodes, the surgeon was only going to remove a sentinel node during my surgery. The sentinel node is the one that fluids first drain to in any specific area of the body, then it disperses the fluid to the other lymph nodes in the area to help flush out any waste or excess fluids. If the sentinel node is removed and examined and shows no sign of cancer, then my cancer will not have spread and we are all happy campers.
To find this sentinel node, I was given an injection of radioactive material into my breast near the nipple. During surgery, the surgeon would take an instrument and wave it over my chest – the loudest beep is where the radioactive material first went to drain and we have found the sentinel node! I’m imagining it was like a Geiger-Counter from Science 9 – but I was going to be asleep so I really don’t know.
After that I was ready for surgery so we headed over to the check-in area to wait until it was my turn.
Sunday, 20 November 2011
The Next Step
Today’s the day I leave for Vancouver to be down there for my surgery. I wanted to write something all week, but really I didn’t know what to write! Life sort of felt like it was getting back to ‘normal’. I had a lot of things to do to prepare – buying a variety of products to help with recovery, making a bunch of phone calls that I might not be able to while I’m away, visiting people, etc etc. And really it kinda seemed boring or too normal to chat about! haha
It seemed like everyone wanted to see me before I headed off to Vancouver – part of me was really happy about that, but part of me was also a little irritated – I mean, I have been here for a while, and people knew when the date was – maybe not squishing it in at the last minute would have been okay too??? But I realized that I was being silly – it’s great to hang out with friends and I have been feeling a lot better lately and able to handle more visiting time. And I made sure that if I couldn’t make it work, to not worry about it, not try and squish it in, and just do what I felt I needed to do.
The last week has been pretty good. People have been telling me I look a lot better than they have seen me look in a long time. Part of that is due to the make-up I can now wear as my skin doesn’t get irritated. Part of it is because I am feeling really great (well comparatively so!!) so I am sure my mood and my spirits aid in my appearance. And part of it is because I no longer have to be on all the different drugs!
I’m still tired a lot – I get tired quickly, I stay in bed for a long time – but I feel better overall. My one friend told me I looked good and when I told her it was likely the make-up she replied “no, you looked tired before. Now you don’t look so tired.” And the colour is returning to my face – I’m not so washed-out/grayish anymore!
It’s been hard to celebrate feeling way better, as surgery has quickly approached. I had a lot of errands to do before the surgery and felt I had to get a lot done before heading to Vancouver. I was chatting with a friend and she said that after reading my blog it seems like I’m not scared about surgery. I should clear that up – I am definitely scared. It’s hard to imagine how my life will be like after I have this done. I wonder about if I will really be able to play sports again, if I will look okay once it’s all done, if the procedure will go as planned.
But at the same time, I know this has to be done. I don’t want to do it, but I know that I need to suck up those feelings and march on with it. Just after I attended a Breast Reconstruction support group meeting, I think I resigned to the fact that it is happening and no matter if I ask 10 questions or 10 million, I still have to go through with it. I’ve done my research, I’ve asked the questions I was worried about, I’ve bought the recommended items to help, and now I just have to go through with it.
I went for lunch to a great Chinese place with my Dad on Friday. We ate and then got our fortune cookies. Mine read “Be brave enough to live creatively”. I just kept staring at the first two words “Be Brave”. Felt it was a bit fitting for my upcoming week, so I stuck it in my pocket so I wouldn’t forget to be brave.
Last night I took pictures of my bare chest. I will likely never look at them, but more than one person who has gone through this has told me to do it as it helped them. I guess I’d rather have the picture and never look at it, then not have it and wish I did.
Anyways, I still have to finish packing before we head out. I’m very thankful that Dad and Cayley will both be with me, and that I have a terrific group of family and friends down in Vancouver to make me smile. As of Tuesday at 1030am, my life will have changed again and I will be one step closer to being cancer-free.
It seemed like everyone wanted to see me before I headed off to Vancouver – part of me was really happy about that, but part of me was also a little irritated – I mean, I have been here for a while, and people knew when the date was – maybe not squishing it in at the last minute would have been okay too??? But I realized that I was being silly – it’s great to hang out with friends and I have been feeling a lot better lately and able to handle more visiting time. And I made sure that if I couldn’t make it work, to not worry about it, not try and squish it in, and just do what I felt I needed to do.
The last week has been pretty good. People have been telling me I look a lot better than they have seen me look in a long time. Part of that is due to the make-up I can now wear as my skin doesn’t get irritated. Part of it is because I am feeling really great (well comparatively so!!) so I am sure my mood and my spirits aid in my appearance. And part of it is because I no longer have to be on all the different drugs!
I’m still tired a lot – I get tired quickly, I stay in bed for a long time – but I feel better overall. My one friend told me I looked good and when I told her it was likely the make-up she replied “no, you looked tired before. Now you don’t look so tired.” And the colour is returning to my face – I’m not so washed-out/grayish anymore!
It’s been hard to celebrate feeling way better, as surgery has quickly approached. I had a lot of errands to do before the surgery and felt I had to get a lot done before heading to Vancouver. I was chatting with a friend and she said that after reading my blog it seems like I’m not scared about surgery. I should clear that up – I am definitely scared. It’s hard to imagine how my life will be like after I have this done. I wonder about if I will really be able to play sports again, if I will look okay once it’s all done, if the procedure will go as planned.
But at the same time, I know this has to be done. I don’t want to do it, but I know that I need to suck up those feelings and march on with it. Just after I attended a Breast Reconstruction support group meeting, I think I resigned to the fact that it is happening and no matter if I ask 10 questions or 10 million, I still have to go through with it. I’ve done my research, I’ve asked the questions I was worried about, I’ve bought the recommended items to help, and now I just have to go through with it.
I went for lunch to a great Chinese place with my Dad on Friday. We ate and then got our fortune cookies. Mine read “Be brave enough to live creatively”. I just kept staring at the first two words “Be Brave”. Felt it was a bit fitting for my upcoming week, so I stuck it in my pocket so I wouldn’t forget to be brave.
Last night I took pictures of my bare chest. I will likely never look at them, but more than one person who has gone through this has told me to do it as it helped them. I guess I’d rather have the picture and never look at it, then not have it and wish I did.
Anyways, I still have to finish packing before we head out. I’m very thankful that Dad and Cayley will both be with me, and that I have a terrific group of family and friends down in Vancouver to make me smile. As of Tuesday at 1030am, my life will have changed again and I will be one step closer to being cancer-free.
Saturday, 12 November 2011
The Results
Last week I went to see my oncology Doctor for my scheduled appointment. I was also having my first IV of only Herceptin in the chemo room. No, I don’t need to have any more chemo, but I do need to take Herceptin 17 times in total, and I have only done 4. So every three weeks I will have to go back to the chemo room and receive my IV.
For the first time since this whole thing began, I was actually quite happy heading to the cancer agency. Don’t get me wrong, the place itself is great. The staff are caring, supportive and helpful and many of the things you need are all at the same place (oncology, radiation, relaxation groups, patient and family counselling, nutritional services, library of books/dvds/cds, etc etc). But for a long time, it felt like every time I got under that roof, I would cry at a moment’s notice.
But not last week! I was happy, talking to the staff, relaxed. I think I just knew that the chemo was over and really, what could be worse?
I saw my Doctor and she had the results of my Echo and my MRI. The Echo showed that my heart is handling everything well – apparently there was little to no change from my baseline Echo. The MRI report compared my initial MRI done in SF in April to the one done about 10 days before my doc’s appointment.
According to Dr. Taylor the report showed that I responded extremely well to the chemo. There now only appears to be one 6 millimeter mass, whereas before there were 6 areas of “mass-like enhancements” with the most prominent mass measuring 2.5 x 2.7 cm. The other 5 ranged from 6mm-12mm. The other breast looks clear and the lymph nodes also look clear.
The Doc seemed very happy with how I had responded and I found myself feeling a little bit relieved. With a mass still there, I definitely need to have the full mastectomy to remove it. I guess I was hoping I didn’t have to do it, but all the docs seem to agree that it’s the best course of action for the best long term results. And knowing that there is still something there makes me feel better about going through with the procedure.
I also was relieved to hear that the chemo did its job. Logically I knew that I had to go through it as part of my treatment, but there was still a small part of me that wondered if I went through all the awfulness of the past 6 months for nothing. But it wasn’t for nothing – it worked. And it will likely give my surgical team the best shot at getting it all with clear margins. (margins are non-infected tissue areas around the tumours that they take to ensure they got the entire tumour).
To continue monitoring me on Herceptin, I will have to go in for an Echo and see the oncologist every 3 months. Herceptin is usually tolerated fairly well, and so far, I haven’t had many side effects. I was quite tired this week, but nothing like I had been. I’m starting to feel better and my face is getting back some colour. Still no eye-lash or eyebrow growth, but I am sure that will come soon.
10 more days until the big day!
For the first time since this whole thing began, I was actually quite happy heading to the cancer agency. Don’t get me wrong, the place itself is great. The staff are caring, supportive and helpful and many of the things you need are all at the same place (oncology, radiation, relaxation groups, patient and family counselling, nutritional services, library of books/dvds/cds, etc etc). But for a long time, it felt like every time I got under that roof, I would cry at a moment’s notice.
But not last week! I was happy, talking to the staff, relaxed. I think I just knew that the chemo was over and really, what could be worse?
I saw my Doctor and she had the results of my Echo and my MRI. The Echo showed that my heart is handling everything well – apparently there was little to no change from my baseline Echo. The MRI report compared my initial MRI done in SF in April to the one done about 10 days before my doc’s appointment.
According to Dr. Taylor the report showed that I responded extremely well to the chemo. There now only appears to be one 6 millimeter mass, whereas before there were 6 areas of “mass-like enhancements” with the most prominent mass measuring 2.5 x 2.7 cm. The other 5 ranged from 6mm-12mm. The other breast looks clear and the lymph nodes also look clear.
The Doc seemed very happy with how I had responded and I found myself feeling a little bit relieved. With a mass still there, I definitely need to have the full mastectomy to remove it. I guess I was hoping I didn’t have to do it, but all the docs seem to agree that it’s the best course of action for the best long term results. And knowing that there is still something there makes me feel better about going through with the procedure.
I also was relieved to hear that the chemo did its job. Logically I knew that I had to go through it as part of my treatment, but there was still a small part of me that wondered if I went through all the awfulness of the past 6 months for nothing. But it wasn’t for nothing – it worked. And it will likely give my surgical team the best shot at getting it all with clear margins. (margins are non-infected tissue areas around the tumours that they take to ensure they got the entire tumour).
To continue monitoring me on Herceptin, I will have to go in for an Echo and see the oncologist every 3 months. Herceptin is usually tolerated fairly well, and so far, I haven’t had many side effects. I was quite tired this week, but nothing like I had been. I’m starting to feel better and my face is getting back some colour. Still no eye-lash or eyebrow growth, but I am sure that will come soon.
10 more days until the big day!
Wednesday, 2 November 2011
The week in review
Yes, I realize it’s only Wednesday, so the week isn’t over yet – hardly time for a ‘week in review’! But it has been a great week so far and I just wanted to share.
Sunday – headed to the hospital for an Echo test on my heart. The woman who was conducting my test had started the department back in 1978 so she really knew her stuff. She also was one of the technicians in the first clinical trial of Herceptin in BC. Talking to her was awesome – she told me all of the Herceptin patients she followed had extremely good outcomes – yah! She reassured me that everything would work out for me.
Monday – Halloween! I headed to work in a costume for our staff lunch. We had Chinese food which was great. Even better was that I had eaten something that turned out to be a little bit spicy, and it wasn’t too bad on my tongue/stomach!! My system is definitely not what it was, but this makes me think that maybe it’s getting better?
I also had a lot of my questions regarding my upcoming surgery addressed. They aren’t all answered yet, but my PSurg’s office and the Breast Cancer Navigator at the cancer agency both said they are doing some research to find me the answers I want before my surgery.
Tuesday – I was on my way to a massage appointment to help get my shoulders/chest prepared for my upcoming surgery when I received a call from the cancer agency. A nurse was calling to let me know that I would receive the full results of the MRI I did on Friday at my next visit with the oncologist (Nov 8th). But in the mean time they didn’t want me to worry so they called to let me know that it looked like I responded “extremely well” to the chemo and they detected no disease in the other (the right side) breast. Yippee!! Full details are coming next week, but for now, yahoo!
Then my massage therapist noticed my hair was growing back! I thought it was, but having someone else point it out is always reassuring
I played soccer last night and while I was way out of shape and a lot tired, it felt great – I even scored a goal!
Wednesday – Today I went to a relaxation group at the cancer agency and really felt awesome after I left. I headed over to meet two people I have met during ‘all this’ – one who went through a cancer diagnosis and treatment 4 years ago at age 36, and one woman who is going through treatment now. It was so awesome to see them and just talk about cancery type things…it’s always nice to hear advice or stories from people who have been through something similar.
So that’s been my week so far. I’m feeling a lot better and hoping that it’s just keeps getting better from this point forward. My mood is really great, my body feels better, and I am just getting really excited about a lot of little things. What a great start to the week!
Sunday – headed to the hospital for an Echo test on my heart. The woman who was conducting my test had started the department back in 1978 so she really knew her stuff. She also was one of the technicians in the first clinical trial of Herceptin in BC. Talking to her was awesome – she told me all of the Herceptin patients she followed had extremely good outcomes – yah! She reassured me that everything would work out for me.
Monday – Halloween! I headed to work in a costume for our staff lunch. We had Chinese food which was great. Even better was that I had eaten something that turned out to be a little bit spicy, and it wasn’t too bad on my tongue/stomach!! My system is definitely not what it was, but this makes me think that maybe it’s getting better?
I also had a lot of my questions regarding my upcoming surgery addressed. They aren’t all answered yet, but my PSurg’s office and the Breast Cancer Navigator at the cancer agency both said they are doing some research to find me the answers I want before my surgery.
Tuesday – I was on my way to a massage appointment to help get my shoulders/chest prepared for my upcoming surgery when I received a call from the cancer agency. A nurse was calling to let me know that I would receive the full results of the MRI I did on Friday at my next visit with the oncologist (Nov 8th). But in the mean time they didn’t want me to worry so they called to let me know that it looked like I responded “extremely well” to the chemo and they detected no disease in the other (the right side) breast. Yippee!! Full details are coming next week, but for now, yahoo!
Then my massage therapist noticed my hair was growing back! I thought it was, but having someone else point it out is always reassuring
I played soccer last night and while I was way out of shape and a lot tired, it felt great – I even scored a goal!
Wednesday – Today I went to a relaxation group at the cancer agency and really felt awesome after I left. I headed over to meet two people I have met during ‘all this’ – one who went through a cancer diagnosis and treatment 4 years ago at age 36, and one woman who is going through treatment now. It was so awesome to see them and just talk about cancery type things…it’s always nice to hear advice or stories from people who have been through something similar.
So that’s been my week so far. I’m feeling a lot better and hoping that it’s just keeps getting better from this point forward. My mood is really great, my body feels better, and I am just getting really excited about a lot of little things. What a great start to the week!
The Cancer Patient’s Purse
Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about what comes with cancer treatment – and what most people would never imagine life is like when going through this. It’s not just the medication, the treatment, the side-effects, the seemingly endless appointments – it’s the ‘life stuff’ too. It’s remarkable how your life needs to adjust in small ways to make it easier to get through everything.
For example, my purse. As I near the end of my chemo ‘stuff’ (ie recovering from the drugs, finally starting to feel better, etc), I realized that I soon will be able to de-clutter my purse of all the items currently in there to help me through this first part.
My purse is nothing out of the ordinary from the outside – medium sized black bag with a few zippers. But what’s inside definitely differs from that of most women my age.
Here’s a list of what is (or was) in my purse that is related to my cancer treatment:
1. Tissues and Q-tips – my eyes will not stop watering so I need to have tissues or q-tips on hand to wipe away the wetness. Eyelashes truly do help your eyes, and not having them really makes the watery moments a lot more messy!
2. Thermometer – During this time, I cannot get sick. So if I even feel a little bit “off” I’m supposed to take my temperature and ensure that I am between 36-38 degrees C. If I were to get over 38 degrees, I need to go immediately to the emergency room. Which leads me to item #3…
3. Emergency Room note – I’ve had to carry around a note with instructions from the cancer agency in case I ended up in the emergency room. It explains to the staff there what to do with me in case of an emergency, which drugs I am on, and who to contact if there are problems.
4. Tums – the ol’ stomach just does not handle things as well as it had. The stomach lining and its cells have been damaged by the chemo, and thus make my tummy a lot rough at times.
5. Plastic bags – For my first set of chemo drugs I carried around a few ziplock bags and a black plastic bag in my purse. Why, you ask? Well in case I got sick, I could puke in the ziplock bag so it wouldn’t leak out, then put that in the black plastic bag so it would be discreet until I found a trash can.
6. Plastic gloves – in case of the situation in #5, plastic gloves were on hand so that if someone was helping me, they would be protected. Apparently chemo puke can be toxic to other people if they get any on them.
7. Eyebrow pencil – drawn-on eyebrows don’t last all day like real eyebrows
8. Sanitary wipes – because people are constantly sick and touching things with their yucky germy hands!
9. Hand sanitizer – see #8
10. Tylenol – not Advil, not ibuprofen, not aspirin - Tylenol only. Apparently the other pain relievers can interfere with my treatment
11. Throat lozenges – but not just any throat lozenges – no sour, citrus, minty flavours as my taste buds cannot handle it. You try finding lozenges without ANY of those…geesh!
12. Cuticle cream – my nails are affected by the chemo so I need to ensure they are constantly moisturized so they don’t peel, crack, or become otherwise irritated or infected
13. Snack – I have a very hard time distinguishing when I am hungry. In fact, I think my hunger sensation has taken a bit of a vacation for the moment. But sometimes when I start to feel really tired and drained, it is my body needing nutrition. Having something on the go helps me until I am able to get home and make something. It often staves off the nauseous feelings as well.
14. Water – getting dehydrated is not in my best interest…well, it’s not really in anyone’s best interest! But having water in my purse also helps with the common side effect of dry mouth - at least until I can get home or somewhere to get more liquid.
15. My book – a little book that I keep track of my doctor’s information, appointment information I have, phone numbers for various places, instructions on what I need to do/eat/etc. I get called all the time about new instructions from the docs, new appointments, referrals to other services, etc. I need a place to track everything while out and about.
I am definitely looking forward to getting rid of a lot of these items and lightening up the purse! Soon I will need it to be lighter anyways – after surgery I am not supposed to lift more than 10lbs! ;)
For example, my purse. As I near the end of my chemo ‘stuff’ (ie recovering from the drugs, finally starting to feel better, etc), I realized that I soon will be able to de-clutter my purse of all the items currently in there to help me through this first part.
My purse is nothing out of the ordinary from the outside – medium sized black bag with a few zippers. But what’s inside definitely differs from that of most women my age.
Here’s a list of what is (or was) in my purse that is related to my cancer treatment:
1. Tissues and Q-tips – my eyes will not stop watering so I need to have tissues or q-tips on hand to wipe away the wetness. Eyelashes truly do help your eyes, and not having them really makes the watery moments a lot more messy!
2. Thermometer – During this time, I cannot get sick. So if I even feel a little bit “off” I’m supposed to take my temperature and ensure that I am between 36-38 degrees C. If I were to get over 38 degrees, I need to go immediately to the emergency room. Which leads me to item #3…
3. Emergency Room note – I’ve had to carry around a note with instructions from the cancer agency in case I ended up in the emergency room. It explains to the staff there what to do with me in case of an emergency, which drugs I am on, and who to contact if there are problems.
4. Tums – the ol’ stomach just does not handle things as well as it had. The stomach lining and its cells have been damaged by the chemo, and thus make my tummy a lot rough at times.
5. Plastic bags – For my first set of chemo drugs I carried around a few ziplock bags and a black plastic bag in my purse. Why, you ask? Well in case I got sick, I could puke in the ziplock bag so it wouldn’t leak out, then put that in the black plastic bag so it would be discreet until I found a trash can.
6. Plastic gloves – in case of the situation in #5, plastic gloves were on hand so that if someone was helping me, they would be protected. Apparently chemo puke can be toxic to other people if they get any on them.
7. Eyebrow pencil – drawn-on eyebrows don’t last all day like real eyebrows
8. Sanitary wipes – because people are constantly sick and touching things with their yucky germy hands!
9. Hand sanitizer – see #8
10. Tylenol – not Advil, not ibuprofen, not aspirin - Tylenol only. Apparently the other pain relievers can interfere with my treatment
11. Throat lozenges – but not just any throat lozenges – no sour, citrus, minty flavours as my taste buds cannot handle it. You try finding lozenges without ANY of those…geesh!
12. Cuticle cream – my nails are affected by the chemo so I need to ensure they are constantly moisturized so they don’t peel, crack, or become otherwise irritated or infected
13. Snack – I have a very hard time distinguishing when I am hungry. In fact, I think my hunger sensation has taken a bit of a vacation for the moment. But sometimes when I start to feel really tired and drained, it is my body needing nutrition. Having something on the go helps me until I am able to get home and make something. It often staves off the nauseous feelings as well.
14. Water – getting dehydrated is not in my best interest…well, it’s not really in anyone’s best interest! But having water in my purse also helps with the common side effect of dry mouth - at least until I can get home or somewhere to get more liquid.
15. My book – a little book that I keep track of my doctor’s information, appointment information I have, phone numbers for various places, instructions on what I need to do/eat/etc. I get called all the time about new instructions from the docs, new appointments, referrals to other services, etc. I need a place to track everything while out and about.
I am definitely looking forward to getting rid of a lot of these items and lightening up the purse! Soon I will need it to be lighter anyways – after surgery I am not supposed to lift more than 10lbs! ;)
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